Shift Your Heart

September 3rd was my birthday….

Eliana Salter — Sun, 06 Sep 2015 00:57:04 +0000

That day, when I started my daily walk with the dog on our bike trail, I wondered if I was going to see a coyote (in Native American medicine, it is a reminder and an invitation for more balance between Wisdom and Joy in our lives).

I hadn’t spotted one on the trail for a few months…up until then…Forgot about it and on my way back, there it was….in the middle of the trail! Staring at us. I got the message…Thank you!

2 years ago, on my 50th birthday I was giving an eulogy to the Life’s Celebration of my friend Barbara Humphrey, who had just passed from Ovarian Cancer, whose journey I was closely involved with. And it was painful to let her and see her go. I guess, losing a loved one will always bring back all the losses I experienced in my life, and all the pain….

But this year, I woke up with a different feeling that some shift was happening inside of me and more and more I was being able to find the “Eye of my hurricane” and stay there, and more and more I was even able to enjoy life from there.

There is a lot going on in my life right now, and a lot of it is not very pleasant, but because of all of my friends and family, because my children and Chris, I have been able to be clear of how really BLESSED I really am.

Then, as we were driving to have dinner together with my mother-in-law and my sister-in-law’s family, we caught eye of a rainbow that “followed” us for quite some time.

I felt blessed again, and like a warm wave engulfing me, I could hear Ricardo’s voice telling me: “Tudo vai dar certo” – Everything is going to be ok.

Life IS good, and I’m so glad that I’m alive.

If I cry sometimes because I miss loved ones that are either far or on another spirit level, it is because I’m blessed for all the love I experience and have experienced.

To ALL, thank you for the blessing you all are, and for sharing the blessing of WHO YOU ARE with me.

Love and Huge Brazilian Hugs!!

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Embracing Your Shadow ……

Eliana Salter — Wed, 01 Jul 2015 18:20:03 +0000

The term Shadow was first used by Carl G. Jung, that refers to all aspects of ourselves that either we are not proud of, or can’t accept, and don’t want to show to the outer world, and therefore, it gets hidden in the shadows and time to time, it comes up because it is the only way for us to become whole again.

Working with Shadow is not an easy and fun ride, but the good news is that once you put the dimmest light into it, there’s no taking back and the definition of darkness no longer applies.

Everyone does a great deal of Shadow Work either they know it or not, in different levels of depth, and awareness.

Another good news is that there is a lot of power in the Shadow (why do you think that no matter how much inner work you have done, when you are triggered you are in a reactive mode and can’t help it, and no amount of rationalization can stop you from behaving and feeling in a way that we are not very proud of) and that power is ours to keep.

This is why I do what I do, I’m a Guide Out Of Hell and an alchemist, I transformed really painful experiences into real treasures, these are the Dark Nights of the Soul, where the unloved parts of us, of our lives, request our attention with no uncertain terms, and I know these walks of life way too well, and I know this is why I survived the way I did, and this is why anyone can survive as well.

We are all Alchemists of the Soul.

You are so special, because the treasures you have, no one else does, and when you completely find your way out hell, and keep sharing you heart and your light, Bliss and Inner Peace is what you can easily choose to experience.

Hell is like a labyrinth with many options of way out, the only required action is that you keep going (like Winston Churchill once said).

Big Brazilian hugs to all!

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The Guest House of “That” Friday, and everyday after….

Eliana Salter — Sat, 23 May 2015 14:57:25 +0000

Today, 23 years ago, it was my parents’ and Ricardo’s funeral….

They died on 5/22/1992 which was a cold day.

And it was a Friday.

We in Brazil bury our deceased within 24 hs of their passing because we don’t do embalming. Which gives only 24 hs for family and friends to be contacted and travel if they are from out of town and want to attend the funeral.

I remember, like a bad dream that you can’t wake up from, of people coming from all over and learning later how they traveled over night in order to come for the funeral. Uncles, aunts, cousins, friends…

I remember standing alone in the middle of three coffins where they looked like sleeping, no blood, nothing (one of the “benefits” of being dead)…, just there, laying like sleeping. While I, on the other hand, was all bruised and beat up with black eye and cuts on my face that couldn’t be stitched, and with a pain in my soul that no amount of tears could console.

And I remember thinking: “Thank God they died on a Friday, because it gives people a chance to come on a Saturday funeral without missing school or days of work…”

Crazy, huh?

Pain does that to you. You think crazy thoughts, you might even do crazy things (which I didn’t…then…), and for what? Just so you can cope with the craziness of the reality you are in.

After all these years, I can still remember as if it is happening right now. And I can’t remember what I had for lunch 3 days ago… How “normal” is that the memory does this kind of thing? Super normal, a lot of people will say.

But it still sucks!

People say: “Time cures everything”.

But like the Brazilian poet Carmem Galvão (a friend’s aunt) once said: “Time doesn’t cure anything….time only takes pain from center stage”.

And as much as pain comes back to center stage, I always do my best to choose life and joy, because I knew there were lessons and treasures in all this pain and since I had already paid the price and they were already all dead, I was better off finding all of this so called “treasure” and not leaving one nugget of it behind.

It is a choice that sometimes I wasn’t very good at making.

Years later, I came across this poem from Rumi that says beautifully how I always felt and how I dealt with all that pain…most of the time

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
As an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

And I am GRATEFUL!

Grateful that I survived the car crash and the aftermath of the painful memories.

Grateful that I had the support of friends and family that helped me through that first year after the accident and beyond. They truly saved my life.

Grateful that Chris (ex-boyfriend turned into a great friend, prior to me meeting, dating, marrying and losing Ricardo) decided to come back to my life and stand by my side and marry me when I was broken in million pieces, and while I went thru the ‘dark nights of my soul”. He is my soulmate and keeps saving my life and holding me when pain comes back on center stage and memory plays its game of “remember when….?”

Grateful for the children Chris and I have together and are now part of the center of my Universe. And their mere existence saves my life everyday that I can celebrate the joy of being their mom in this lifetime.

Yes, sorrow wipes my house clean of its furniture every time, and every time I’m ready for a new delight.

Eliana Salter, Saturday May 23rd 2015.

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